Divorce, Being Together and Love

as i look back
over my former marriage
of over twenty two years
i understand that the underlying reason we divorced
is because we had difficulty being together

so in a sense
we were divorced in many ways
right from the beginning
after twenty two years
we gave up having difficulty together
and in trying to understand the other

many factors fostered a spirit of being closed, disconnect, protective and distant
in many areas of our lives
our family of origin, education, and personal choices along the way
were quite weak and faulty
it is easy to look at other people
and copy what appears right and fine
but unless one's deepest foundation
is firm and secure
whatever edifice one may build
if founded upon unwise principles
may one day come tumbling down
as was the case in my life
no religion, gurus, money,
or vain co-depend caring or fixing
will save you
but love can save you
and love in the sense of what manifests itself
as being open, connected, vulnerable and intimate
is the process of the love i speak of